Uncategorized – Improvement Dave

Your Brain Is Curating Your World

Synchronized Synchronicity (Or Maybe Just Paying Attention)
Today is Cinco de Mayo:
A holiday many United States of Americans treat like Mexico’s Independence Day.

Cinco de Mayo and Perception

Cinco de Mayo. or, what it really is “5th of March.”

It marks a single battle in 1862, but here in the U.S., it’s been repackaged into something else entirely: a reason to drink.
I’m not drinking right now —
And I’m not sure I ever want to again.

What Is Synchronicity?

This post is about synchronicity. At times in my life, I perceived this phenomenon in an overzealous or spiritual way. I like the idea of mysterious forces working behind the scenes, and I’m sure that plays a big part in our experience. But I don’t want to delve too deep into that side of this here—not because I don’t believe it, but because I don’t want to waste energy trying to prove something that isn’t provable.

My point here is that we all live in the same universe, and that universe is connected to itself. As much as we would like to perceive ourselves as individual participants in the ecosystem, the truth is that through our surroundings, we are all connected to each other.

A Series of Events

What got me thinking about this was a series of events that happened to me over the past month. Actually, all of it happened in the last week.

Let me start by just saying my family loves to go to Babler State Park, just southwest of St. Louis city in Missouri. We go there at least a few times a year.

Leaning Into Community

I’ve gotten fully involved in my local chapter of ATD. (That is the Association of Talent Development in St. Louis.) The local chapter has been very supportive of my trying to grow as a professional into being a better instructional designer and training facilitator. The relationship has grown to the point where I’m now serving on the board as the Director of Educational Technology. Being on the board means that I know a lot more about what’s going on and what’s being offered by the chapter.

So when something came up about networking in nature, I raised my hand right away and said I’m there, whatever you need me to do. I think there were some discussions about what parks we all liked in the area, so I probably mentioned that I like Castlewood, Babler, and Creve Coeur Park. So this event ended up happening in Babler.

Back to Babler

As we were preparing for the event, I was talking with Sarah Garner, who is organizing the whole thing, and I was joking with her. I said, I’m going on a field trip next week—guess where it is? It’s at Babler. She responded with a 😆.

So I went to that event last week at Babler, and our meeting spot was right next to the pavilion that our family always goes to.

Geocaching Enters the Picture

Then, a couple of days later, I was recording a podcast with Dave Smiderle – from Burlington, Ontario, Canada; and since this is GameLayer, we were talking about games and learning. Out of the blue, Dave brought up geocaching. Where you use GPS to find specific coordinates on a map. Someone leaves you a treasure, you fill out the log, put in a new treasure, and then continue on your hike.

Geocaching, a man looking for a hide in a wooden cavity

Two people finding a geocache in the forest. Shallow depth of field with sharp focus on woman.

I mentioned to Dave S. that I’ve heard about geocaching from some art friends in college who loved the adventure of the whole thing.

That episode is dropping soon, and you can hear more about it there.

The Moment of Synchronicity

Just yesterday, I received a text message on an app called ClassDojo from my child’s teacher. She shared that we will be traveling to Babler State Park and partaking in a geocaching activity. Now, in my inner self, I sensed the synchronicity of everything that was happening in my life. In the podcast with Dave, I expressed a deep interest in getting into geocaching, and I meant it. And it feels to me like my sincere interest is what caused the activity at the field trip I’ll be at next Thursday to be geocaching.

A Rational Counterpoint

One could easily argue that I’m making this all up, and I think that is a perfectly rational stance. Here’s why: now I’ve been talking about geocaching more, and a colleague at work named Karen said, “Oh, geocaching—I used to do that with my kids.” Now I’m learning more about the process from her. I’m not arguing that there’s some underground magic happening behind the scenes.

It’s coming up more because I’m thinking about it and talking about it more. …right?

So What’s the Point?

So, what’s my point in all of this, you ask?

My point here is that if you seek something out and set your intention on something, then that thing will find you. Half because you’re looking for it, and half just because you notice it more. It might be a bit of a stretch to argue that the universe is going to rearrange itself around your intentions and desires, but after a while, it really does sort of feel like that.

Bringing It Back to Beer

Let me tie it back into drinking—or not drinking alcohol—Or drinking NA—for Cinco de Mayo. While I was at Babler State Park for the ATD networking-in-nature event, I looked in the cooler and saw my favorite non-alcoholic (NA) beer. It is Athletic. It’s a beer that’s brewed to be nonalcoholic. They are NOT trying to reproduce some other famous beers without the alcohol.

This results in an incredibly delicious beer-like beverage, which just happens to not have alcohol in it. If I hadn’t made the conscious decision over the last couple of years to cut alcohol out of my life, I wouldn’t have known about this beer, and it wouldn’t have been a noticable.

But because I have done that, and because I’ve grown very fond of Athletic brand beer, I brought it up and asked Sarah if she brought that. She said, “I’m an advocate!”

I called out, “Me too!” over the picnic table, and several people looked at us, getting excited about some beer that doesn’t even have alcohol in it. Now, these people are probably concerned about my mental well-being, and that’s fair from their vantage point.

The Pattern Behind It All

The fact of the matter remains: if you start to pursue a certain thought, object, or culture, then those thoughts, those objects, and that culture will start to seek you out as well. Why is that? Because the entire universe really is a single item. It is all connected, and the flap of a butterfly’s wing can cause a wind that in turn leads to a series of events that topple a mountain.

An Invitation

If you’ve made it this far, then I implore you: the next time something seems to find you, let yourself believe that magic is real. Just trust for a minute that the universe itself is consciously providing you with what you desire. Give it a shot—not because it is an entirely provable thought process, but because it enriches your experiences and provides meaning beyond language. And from my perspective, enriching experiences are all that matter.

Final Thought

It very well may not be the case that the universe is out to conspire for or against you. …But I know one thing to be true: human perception is always colored by our previous experience, and when things don’t make sense, the human mind fills in the gaps without us even knowing. Our perception of the world is provably inaccurate. Also, the human mind is an infinitely creative machine, and it feeds on what you give it. So be mindful of what you’re feeding it, because it literally shapes your perception of the world around you. And in turn, your perception recreates the world you live in.

Closing Quote

Talent is the ability to let ideas
manifest themselves through you.

~ Rick Ruben

When You Stop Listening to Your Self

Not That Kind of Hospital Post

It’s always bizarre to me when people post pictures of themselves lying in a hospital bed, all connected to wires, on social media. This is not one of those posts, although the image is of me in a hospital office.

The Appointment

I admitted myself—or rather, scheduled an appointment—with the nurse practitioner at my primary care physician’s practice. I was experiencing the symptoms of sciatica. I’ve done some research, and everyone explains that sciatica is caused by a twisted vertebra or a bulging disc between vertebrae—what chiropractors call a subluxation.

I went to the appointment and labeled the visit “exploration into sciatica.” This way, the medical professionals already knew why I was there. I followed their line of questioning and relied on all the research I had done.

“Yes, I think that I have something wrong with a vertebra because I have shooting pain in the back of my leg, the back of my calf, and the top of my ankle. It’s worse when I sit for long periods or when I climb stairs, and it’s better after I do some stretching and take a mild walk.”

A Key Realization

Here’s where the story gets interesting. If I really think about it, I’ve never had any pain in my lower back. It really doesn’t hurt there. It hurts below that, in the muscle deep inside my gluteus maximus—aka my butt cheek.

A Conversation That Changed Everything

Afterward, I was chatting with my neighbor, we shall call him “Dr. J.”, although that is not the real name of this Dr. The Doctor became a pathologist because the doctor is sick of dealing with people, and I don’t blame the Doctor for this. I think it’s the same reason I became an instructional designer.

Anyway, he explained that there’s a syndrome that has the exact same symptoms as a lumbar vertebra out of place. Piriformis syndrome is when you pull a muscle that’s connected from your hip down into your leg. It’s often confused with a disrupted vertebra, causing the pinched nerve and shooting pain.

Listening to My Body

If I had just listened to my body, I would’ve known this. While I was in the doctor’s office, I relied on the knowledge I had gained from my research online. I was using that to inform my answers to the nurse practitioner’s questions.

It’s easy to judge myself on this in hindsight. After all, my logical brain is what I allow to drive my consciousness. However, if I had paused and listened, there would’ve been much less stress around this entire experience. Instead of having a messed-up back, I simply would’ve had a pulled muscle in my butt!

Final Thought

Either way, it is a total pain in the ass! But it didn’t need to cause me such alarm. It would not have caused me such alarm if I had slowed down long enough to listen to my self.

We also have people dying longer, we are able to keep people alive without much quality of life in many cases. We haven’t done a great job of making healthspan match up with lifespan, which is both miserable and unbelievably costly – and frightening.

Ken Dychtwald

David Kolmer writes for Improvementdave.com.

David Kolmer also hosts and produces at podcast at GAMELAYER

Finding Your Tribe by Embracing Differences

Learning who your tribe isn’t can be just as valuable as learning who it is.

In my last post, I wrote about choosing yourself. I intended to go deeper into personal identity and the idea of pursuing multiple ideas to see which ones “choose you back,” but I didn’t quite get there. Those are threads I’ll come back to.

For now, I want to explore a related concept: focusing on the 33% of your audience who truly resonate with you.

That recent post was inspired by the song “Choose Yourself“.

The Podcast That Sparked This

This post was inspired by a recent podcast conversation with my friend Kassy LaBorie that will drop this week on The Spark Konnect – Podcast.

I’ve written about Kassy before—she wears red pants as a bold expression of her personality. (I’ve also written about occasionally wearing blue pants myself.) These small choices act as signals of identity.

Kassy shared something interesting with me. The guest she had on before our episode was nothing like either of us. The guest was bold, outspoken, highly analytical, competitively athletic, and focused professionally on detecting deception through body language.

Her energy didn’t match Kassy’s at all. Kassy was candid—she found the interview difficult. So much so that she questioned whether she should publish it at all.

I argued that she should, and I want to explain why.

Discomfort and the Search for Truth

Let me go back to where this idea started for me.

In high school, I had an uncomfortable realization: if I truly valued thoughtful conversation—Socratic debate, the kind that leads to truth—then I would have to engage with people I didn’t agree with… or even like.

That’s not easy.

It requires accepting that your worldview might not be perfect. And that’s uncomfortable for anyone.

At a recent tour of an electrical manufacturing plant, the presenter said the equipment was not electrified. As a person of learning, I had to test his hypothesis.

Now fast forward to today, where many of us are creating content—podcasts, blogs, conversations—with friends, acquaintances, or even strangers. Some we agree with, some we partially understand, and some we fundamentally disagree with.

That spectrum matters.

Why You Should Share the Hard Conversations

If I only interview people who think, talk, and act like me, I’m doing a disservice to my audience.

If everyone on the Game Layer Podcast metaphorically “wears blue pants,” then the idea of blue pants as individuality loses meaning. It becomes uniform. It fades into sameness.

Truth doesn’t emerge from agreement—it emerges from challenge.

We grow by engaging with people who think differently. Not just people who prefer a different brand of peanut butter, but people whose perspectives fundamentally challenge our beliefs.

The Risk of Going Too Far

Of course, there’s a valid concern: what if the differences are too great?

What if someone’s worldview feels incompatible with your own?

That’s worth considering.

Maybe Kassy’s previous guest lives in a world neither of us would choose to inhabit. That’s okay. We can decide what we allow into our lives.

But even then, there’s still value.

We can learn from people we don’t understand. From people we don’t like. From people we don’t want to become.

Exposure expands our understanding of the human experience.

When Someone Challenges Your Core Belief

I experienced this firsthand in a podcast micro-episode I recorded a few months ago.
I do a show on Game Learning and Creativity called GAMELAYER.

I spoke with someone whose industry doesn’t allow time for creativity or game-based learning. He said it plainly: he doesn’t have time for that.

Instead of pushing back, I listened.

Really listened.

By the end of the conversation, I found myself agreeing with him—even though his perspective challenged the core theme of my podcast: that life and work should include joy, creativity, and play.

So how can both be true?

Here it is:

118 |No time for Creativity |
Mike Mowad

Understanding Your “People”

My goal is to be in an environment where my creative strengths are used. That’s how I thrive.

People who thrive in that same way—those are my people.

But that doesn’t mean everyone needs to think like me. …and it definitely doesn’t mean every guest on my podcast should agree with my perspective.

In fact, the opposite is true. The show becomes stronger when it includes voices that challenge the premise.

New Office DIGS!

Because those are the same challenges these ideas will face in the real world.

What Kassy Did Right

When I listened to Kassy’s episode, I noticed something important.

She didn’t shut down.

She stayed open.

She listened to the perspective, asked questions, and acknowledged that the conversation stretched her—and would likely stretch her audience too.

That’s exactly the point.

The Skill Behind It: Deep Listening

Why did both of us approach it this way?

Part of it comes from our backgrounds in theater.

In theatre, listening isn’t passive. You listen with your whole body. You’re not analyzing someone to judge them—you’re trying to feel what they feel and understand their emotional state.

The other part comes from our work as facilitators.

Good facilitators seek first to understand, and then help others understand.

That’s the skill.

Final Thought

You don’t build a meaningful platform by only surrounding yourself with agreement.

You build it by engaging with difference—thoughtfully, intentionally, and with curiosity.

Because the goal isn’t just to find your tribe.

It’s to understand the full landscape of people—especially the ones who challenge you.

Whatever you do in life, surround yourself with smart people who’ll argue with you.
~John Wooden

https://www.instagram.com/gamelayer.fm/

Choosing Yourself: A Journey to Personal Empowerment

I don’t Choose Myself…AND that’s been the problem. I’ve spent my life choosing others’ expectations over myself—and I’m done.

Hey, I’m Dave Kolmer, the guy behind Improvement Dave. My word for the year is FOCUS. (Read more here.) Not as a slogan, but as a commitment to refine what matters and clear out what doesn’t. I need to:

CHOOSE MYSELF …and maybe that is something you need to work on, too.

A Song that Stayed With Me for Years

In this post, I will review a song. This is a song that I heard several years ago while doing yard work. The first time I heard this song, I stopped what I was doing, and I listened to it again. Then I saved it and sent it to myself.

I told myself I would blog about it, but then I didn’t write the post.
I told myself it didn’t fit my word of the year yet, so I set it aside.

The truth? This song scared me. I felt it too deeply.
I started to feel like I would write this post when I was ready.

Ready for What?

To be ready to choose myself above other people. Something I don’t let myself do. I do not choose myself above other people because:

I am afraid others will perceive me as vain or arrogant.

The Song

Listen here:

Bandcamp: starslingeruk.bandcamp.com/track/choose-yourself
YouTube: https://youtu.be/dmedDwvmTK0?si=JrTypRAxHdr2ADer

REVIEW

I planned to paste the lyrics and react in classic Improvement Dave fashion, but you can read or listen to them yourself. Instead, I’m taking the heart of the song and responding more directly. I’m a creative person—something I once claimed proudly, then quietly traded for stability and responsibility. Therapy has made it impossible to ignore what that trade cost me.

I still need to create to be happy.

While the idea of living without purpose sounds dreamy, it feels unrealistic; we all have responsibilities and that ever‑present pressure to do the things we’d rather avoid.

[You can see one of my biggest responsibilities to the right. My need to create has rubbed off on my son. He had a grouping of Pokémon cards he didn’t think were “rare,” so he made a shirt of them.]

I asked if I could post this online, and he said, “Sure, ” without a second thought… I could learn a thing or two from his confidence.

30% or 33.3%?

I still feel the daily pull to make things, which is why this song hits so hard. I’ve seen firsthand that about 30% of people love my work, 30% hate it, and 30% never notice—so my focus now is on serving the ones who care. And while the idea of living without purpose sounds dreamy, it feels unrealistic; we all have responsibilities and that ever‑present pressure to do the things we’d rather avoid.

I traded creativity for stability.

Maybe you’re doing the thing you have to do, not the thing you want to do. I enjoy my career, but some parts hit that familiar knot in my stomach—the fear that comes with admitting I might want something different. It’s like stepping onto a narrow bridge over a pit you’d rather not look into.

WHAT IF

I FAIL?

The answer to this is we never fail. We either hit the nail square on the head or we find a moment of learning. It is a Win (+) or a Delta (Δ).

Ideas Out in Space

This quote from the song is liberating to me. It is freeing because I live with analysis paralysis on the daily.

“I have lots of ideas, how do I pick the right one?
Execute on as many as possible.
The right idea will pick you.”

There’s a theme running through several books I’ve read this year—Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert and The Creative Act by Rick Rubin. They suggest that ideas float around in the ether, waiting for someone ready to receive them. Sometimes they show up before we’re prepared; other times we’re ready but unwilling, and the idea moves on to someone who is.

I’ve brought a lot of ideas to life on this blog, but lately I’ve slowed down. I tell myself it’s because of my work on Gamelayer.fm, but that’s just an excuse. I should be using this space to support the podcast, and I haven’t followed through the way I intended.

Master of All Trades

I can quote the ending of the song out of order for once:

“Ultimately, mastery is about connecting the dots of many fields.”

IF we don’t let the mind drift and sit on the side of the road in quiet meditation, observing the thoughts pass. THEN we will never have a creative thought that is ours and ours alone. This is the great paradox of meditation. We are not quieting the mind; we are training the mind.

Master of All Trades

YOU are Kenough

Going back to the song in the order of appearance…

We are:

“…taught at an early age that we are not good enough.“

Organized education. School is supposed to prepare us for life, but mostly it just trains us to succeed at school. As Thomas J. Stanley argues in The Millionaire Mind, real success isn’t about grades or pedigree—it’s about the strength of your idea and the grit to make it happen.

Money Shot

“Get paid, get laid, lose weight.”

This is that old formula for chasing external validation. But choosing yourself means flipping that script. It’s not about pleasing others or mastering the right test answers; it’s about backing your own ideas and valuing your own voice. Success comes from knowing what you want, standing behind it, and moving with the kind of confidence that makes others follow your lead.

Be That Candle

“One candle can light a thousand other candles
And still remain lit itself.
Be that candle.”

You can earn money from others, but when you offer something real, and they value it, it isn’t taking — it’s exchanging light. That image reminds me of spiritual practice: one candle lighting another, each flame standing on its own.

By somchairakin

The same goes for us. My wife says, “Don’t compare yourself to other people,” and she’s right. Choosing yourself means running your own race, slowing down when you need to, listening to your breath, and taking care of the body and mind you actually live in.

Silence

Mind focused, silence speaks volumes.

“Out of silence comes the greatest creativity
Not when we are rushing and panicking.”

Choosing yourself means honoring that silence, stepping out of the race that was never yours to run. Don’t trade your health or your mind for money, status, or a title. Golden handcuffs still sink you, and losing yourself is too high a price. When you choose others’ expectations over your own life, you drown long before you notice you’ve gone under.

So here it is

I’m choosing myself. I am making myself write the post,
This post, the one I feared I could never write…

You should, too.

Because…

“If you don’t choose yourself, someone else will.”

What do you think? Does this resonate with you?
What is a small change you can make today to start Choosing Yourself?

Work Cited

Altucher, J. (2013). Choose Yourself!: Be Happy, Make Millions, Live the Dream. Choose Yourself Media.

Ellenberg, J. (2014). How not to be wrong: The power of mathematical thinking. Penguin Press.

Stanley, T. J. (2000). The millionaire mind. Andrews McMeel Publishing.

Starslinger (2019). Choose Yourself [Song].

Did you like this article? Then you might LOVE the GAMELAYER Podcast.

To Link-Out or NOT Link-Out: on LinkedIn

Welcome to Improvement Dave, I am Dave. I will be your guide on your journey to “Choose to Improve.”

I recently wrote a post on Linked In about how it is not beneficial [for the health of you post] to link to something outside of LinkedIn. That sounds confusing and after you finally process it counterintuitive:

Here is a link to that post.

I chose to link to that post instead of linking this post to that post. Explain that to your grandparents!

image links to LinkedIN post.

Understanding Linked In’s Algorithm: The Link Paradox

A recent connection, and dare I say new friend, called Christian Gossan, had a beer last week, Outback on the other side of the world, with a friend I don’t know. A friend who posts on LinkedIn and gets millions of views. (Something I have never done but now aspire to…) He had some advice after seeing one of my posts about a podcast I recorded last year with Christian. “Don’t link outside of thah platform, ya NOOB! The algorithm dudn’t like that, MATE!” Here I was… sitting around thinking that linking to an outside learning artifact I created looks cool, when in reality, it was hindering my reach!

What is the outcome? I have begun discussions with my digital colleague at work, “Copilot.ai.” We are cooking up a convo titled: “Strategic LinkedIn Growth Plan.” and it has already resulted in a new tagline and about me section. Something even more accurate, AND also more compelling. We are not in a binary experience. We are in a spectrum of shades. A vast sea of grey.

Why am I doing ANY of This!?

This brings up a deeper question. “Why do I create anything?” …am I trying to help others learn from my experience (or even my mistakes), OR, am I trying to reach a broader audience? Is this therapy, Lisa? Should I also get real therapy, Betty?

Well, the answer to all of that is “YES.” This might not have to be a this-or-that dichotomy. What’s the point of helping only a few when you can help many? If the algorithm likes it, then that is where I find myself. Those are my “Given Circumstances” to plug a theater gem. To go deeper still, things are not inherently good or bad. It is the labels we put on them that make them blessed or evil.

Outcome

New About Me

After a long discussion with Copilot.AI (which uses a slow work deep dive of ChatGPT) I had a plan. The plan included a better about me section on linked in. I used the same conversation channel and came up with a new about me for Linked in, and it contained twice the number of allowed spaces. So I worked on removing inaccuracies and used Copilot to cut it down even further until it read more like a story:

“If you’re here, you’re probably curious about the space where creativity, learning, and community meet—and how a little play can change the way we grow and work. That’s the space I live in.

I’m David Kolmer, a creative strategist, instructional designer, professional learner, and community builder. My path has taken me from theater stages to podcast studios, from SCUBA-beach classrooms in Thailand to boardrooms in St. Louis. Through all of it, one belief has stayed constant: learning should be memorable, meaningful, and, whenever possible, fun.

At the National Association of Electrical Distributors (NAED), I design and support learning experiences that help professionals thrive in a rapidly changing industry. Whether I’m building microlearning, shaping a curriculum, or crafting a multimedia story, I focus on curiosity, clarity, and real‑world application. I want learners to feel engaged, not obligated.

Storytelling sits at the center of my work. My theater roots taught me that people don’t remember information—they remember experiences. Every learning journey has a narrative arc, and every learner is the hero of their own story. That mindset shapes everything from my instructional design to my podcasting.

I’m also a lifelong experimenter with tools and frameworks. From Articulate 360 and 7TAPS to Photoshop, video, and podcasting platforms, I love exploring new ways to bring ideas to life. My portfolio spans eLearning, video, audio, and live facilitation, each project a chance to test, iterate, and improve.

Community fuels me. I’ve presented at ATD events, supported GamiCon, facilitated workshops, and connected with countless learners and creators. I believe professional growth is a shared adventure — one built on curiosity, generosity, and a willingness to try new things even at the risk of initial failure.

If you’re passionate about reimagining learning, exploring the power of play, or building communities of practice, I’d love to connect. Let’s see what we can create together. ~~~

Portfolio: DavidKolmer.com/portfolio
Blog: ImprovementDave.com
Podcast: GAMELAYER.fm“

Conclusion

We are not in a binary experience. We are in a spectrum of shades. A vast sea of grey.

IF we move toward the singularity where machines and humans grow together, we will have the same problems we have always had. The new Generative AI we have built is now based on the human mind. Why are we so surprised it has shortcomings? It is just becoming more human.

Listen to David Kolmer on GAMELAYER RADIO

QUOTE: “A thoughtful, steady plan is exactly the right instinct. LinkedIn rewards consistency, clarity of message, and genuine engagement—not frantic posting. Since you’re already operating at a high level in L&D, creative strategy, and community building, you have a strong foundation. What you need now is a system that compounds over time.” ~Copilot.AI

Why Focus is My Word of the Year

Every year, I pick a word. The first one was at the end of 2022; I picked “honesty” retroactively. Because I wasn’t really being honest with myself about my personal and professional development. As I continue using these words, I’m realizing that both of those forms of development help each other. It’s a symbiotic relationship. When I develop myself professionally, my personal life benefits and vice versa.

Previous Years Words

You can review previous posts that I created in January to read up on my path. Others were “Consistency“, “Integrated“, and last year was “Novelty“. This year I will Focus.

I’ve got to the point where I realize that I’m not choosing these words. It’s not really accurate to say that these words choose me, either. Seeing as they’re just a verbal representation of ideas. It’s more like the ideas have found me, and I’m allowing them to shape me. (If you can subscribe to the ideas of Elizabeth Gilbert and Rick Rubin; that ideas exist separately from the humans that find them.)

Why Focus after Novelty?

Last year, I spent time remaining mostly sober and seeking out novelty. Novelty is about saying yes to experiences, seeking out new opportunities, and doing as much as you can. Then those experiences leave impressions or memories on your mental timeline. This, in turn, expands your perception of time. Since time is a construct of the mind anyway, our perception of it is all that matters. Broadening our experiences in the name of making our lives feel longer may be the closest thing we will ever get to time travel.🧘

I: spoke at conferences, pretended I started my own conference, started a podcast, recorded live podcasts, continued certifications in Game Learning, and developed a card game about my industry… …all while spending time with my family, updating a rental propery and learning how to play Pokémon Go.

Screenshot

You can read my post from 2025 if you want to learn about novelty.

I have noticed my “words of the year” tend to expand and then contract. Go out, try new things, and then reel it back in. Like an ebb and flow, like an inhale in an exhale. Like contrasting values to create a physical form on a two-dimensional surface.

Novelty was about expanding, saying yes to new things, whereas Focus is about contracting. I selected focus, and then the word opportunity came to me; something about that didn’t feel right. Having a year of novelty and then a year of seeking out opportunity. Somehow it seemed to distort the balance like a double yin and not enough yang.

Focus

I need more focus. I need to focus more on what really matters. Spending time with my kids while they are still young and still need me. I need to focus on opportunities that provide a return. In this way, it’s all connected anyway, but this is a better way to frame it.

Was it not enough that my wife shared, “You need to focus, David.”

My mom also said, “You are always running somewhere lately. You are always in a hurry.”

That’s not like me. That’s not how I naturally am. The year of Novelty turned me into a scattered runner. Trying to do more novel things, and I need to round that off. This morning I had a realization after an early set of yoga with some black coffee. I had a good feeling, and it came to me as a visual… I tried to recreate it with Adobe Firefly, and it isn’t half bad…

This morning, I had a realization. This place I am visualizing has a certain mental buoyancy. You effortlessly float above all the sludge. All the worry, all the dread, all the ignorance, and all the drunkenness. Like a small raft floating over an ocean of beasts, poison, and misdirection. Not hydroplaning over the ocean, and not sinking either. Between the layer of dark oily liquids and the thick air, hovering, balanced.

Focus = Relaxed + Aware

I was listening to the first episode of 10% happier, the podcast by Dan Harris. He had his master instructor, Joseph Goldstein, on the show. They were talking about a new book. They’re writing where they’re using. Dr. Goldstein‘s catch phrases on how to be better at meditating… things like “When you are sitting, realize you are sitting.” Or “Just try again, just keep trying.” Or “Mara, I see you.” Mara here being the embodiment or physical representation of ignorance or temptation.

The part of the discussion that really stood out to me was absolutely fundamental. The idea of being both relaxed and aware. That really is the goal of meditation, isn’t it? It’s the goal of all religions. If you’re too relaxed to get all spaced out. If you’re too aware, you start to get too deep and start worrying about things. Things that don’t matter or that you can’t control. It is obvious, and it is easier said than done.

This Must Be the Path!

I wanted to find a single word that represented both of these things: being relaxed and aware. I’m not 100% certain that when I went back to the word, focus, I hit the mark. I do feel it fits the bill. I really don’t feel like I’m forcing a square peg into a round hole. Feels more like I loosely inserted a round peg into a square hole. It fits, but there’s some empty space around it. It doesn’t wiggle, there’s still room for improvement, and if you’ve read any of my stuff you kind of know that that’s my thang.

I SEE YOU MARA!

Can I Handel the Truth from Chat GPT?

A friend of mine, Lisa, recently made a post where she asked ChatGPT to roast her year.

At first glance, it made me pause. It’s easy to wonder why someone would willingly invite criticism—especially in a professional space like LinkedIn, where we’re often curating a highlight reel of wins, confidence, and forward momentum. Why choose vulnerability when Polish feels safer?

Confidence, Vulnerability, and the Courage to Learn in Public

I think about this tension a lot.

On one side, we’re taught—explicitly and implicitly—that confidence is currency. Confidence communicates competence. It signals decisiveness. It reassures others that you know what you’re doing and that you’re someone worth following. In many professional environments, confidence is treated as a prerequisite for leadership.

And yet, there’s a paradox hiding in plain sight.

The most grounded, durable confidence doesn’t come from pretending we’re flawless. It comes from being comfortable with vulnerability.

True confidence allows room for honesty. Vulnerability requires admitting shortcomings—sometimes publicly. That can feel risky, especially when your professional reputation feels like it’s always on display.

But here’s the learning that keeps resurfacing for me:
Confidence and vulnerability are not opposites. They’re partners.

Walking, after all, is just a controlled state of falling. Learning works the same way. Growth is a controlled state of failure.

When we fail safely—with reflection, intention, and humility—we create the conditions for real professional development. We experiment. We stretch. We discover what doesn’t work so we can find what does.

And when some of us choose to do that learning out loud, something powerful happens.

We don’t just grow ourselves—we create permission for others to grow too. We normalize learning. We model courage. We quietly say, You don’t have to have it all figured out to be worthy of progress.

That’s why Lisa’s post stuck with me. And it’s why I decided to do it too.

I asked for the roast.
And yes—I posted it on LinkedIn.

Not because I enjoy discomfort, but because I believe leadership is less about appearing perfect and more about serving others through honesty, learning, and example.

A Simple Framework for Staying True While You Grow

Professional development doesn’t require you to abandon who you are. In fact, the best growth happens when you stay grounded in your values while stretching your capabilities. Here’s a four-step approach I’ve found helpful.

1. Anchor Yourself in Honesty

Growth starts with an accurate view of reality. Be honest with yourself about what’s working and what isn’t. This isn’t self-criticism—it’s self-awareness. Leaders who serve others well begin by telling themselves the truth.

Ask: What am I avoiding because it’s uncomfortable to admit?

2. Choose a Growth Mindset Over Image Management

When protecting your image becomes the goal, learning slows down. A growth mindset shifts the question from “How do I look?” to “What am I learning?” Failure becomes data, not a verdict.

Progress beats polish—every time.

3. Be Brave Enough to Be Vulnerable (Strategically)

Vulnerability doesn’t mean oversharing. It means sharing with purpose. When you talk about struggles in the context of learning, you build trust and credibility. You show others that growth is possible—and ongoing.

Courage isn’t the absence of fear; it’s acting in alignment with your values despite it.

4. Lead Through Service, Not Perfection

Servant leadership is rooted in helping others grow, succeed, and feel seen. When you model learning in public, you remove pressure from others to be flawless. You create psychological safety—and that’s where teams, organizations, and individuals thrive.

Leadership isn’t about standing above others. It’s about creating space for them to rise.

It was on the same chat as my LinkedIn Post

When I created my roast I used the same thread or discussion I used to shape up the Linked In Post I sent to my computer using What’s App. I dictate my writings into my phone while I am making bread or doing dishes or driving. That makes my writing more conversational and fluid. It also makes me more honest.

My 2025 Roast from Chat GPT

A Gentle Roast of Dave’s Decision-Making & Habits (2025 Edition)

Dave, your biggest decision-making strength is also your most reliable self-sabotage tool.

You don’t just think deeply—you think iteratively. Relentlessly. You revisit ideas like they’re sourdough starters that might finally be ready this time. You ask for version two. Then shorter. Then punchier. Then warmer. Then more UX. Then more servant leadership. Then “work slowly for accuracy.” Then—somehow—more minimal but also richer.

Your brain does not ship products.
It cultivates ecosystems.

You are incredibly clear on values and hilariously indecisive on final forms. You know exactly what kind of leader you want to be, but you’ll rearrange the deck chairs on a single paragraph for 45 minutes because “the tone isn’t quite there yet.”

Your decision-making pattern in 2025 could be summarized as:

“This is good.
But what if it were truer?”

Which is noble.
And also exhausting.

Your Habits, Lovingly Roasted

• You start excellent things more often than you finish good enough things.
• You treat clarity like a moving target instead of a milestone.
• You have strong opinions about colors, frameworks, leadership, and learning—but need external confirmation before declaring something “done.”
• You are deeply allergic to premature confidence, yet secretly wish you could borrow some without losing integrity.
• You believe in learning in public… but still hesitate before hitting “post,” just in case it could be 10% better.

You don’t procrastinate.
You refine defensively.

Your Relationship With Failure

You talk about failure beautifully. Poetically, even.

You believe learning is a controlled state of failure—
but you still want the safety rails bolted on, color-coded, and peer-reviewed before you fall.

You want to be brave and responsible.
Vulnerable and helpful.
Bold and accurate.

Which means sometimes the riskiest thing you do…
is thinking about the risk a little longer.

The Irony (This Is the Roast’s Core)

You already act like the leader you’re trying to become.

You practice servant leadership.
You center reflection.
You value honesty over polish.

But you occasionally delay impact because you want your intent to be unmistakable.

Here’s the hard truth, delivered with respect:

People don’t need your work to be perfect to be helped by it.
They need it to be real—and released.

Final Roast Line (Affectionate, but True)

Dave, you are not stuck because you lack clarity.
You’re stuck because you have too much integrity to rush and too much care to simplify.

Your next level of leadership won’t come from better thinking.
It will come from deciding sooner, trusting your values, and letting the work be slightly unfinished—on purpose.

Which, ironically, is exactly the lesson you’ve been teaching all year.

Learning in Public Is a Gift

Sharing our learning edges won’t be comfortable—and it’s not supposed to be. But when done thoughtfully, it becomes an act of service.

So yes, I did the roast.
And I shared it.

Not because I have all the answers—but because I’m committed to the process. To honesty. To growth. To becoming the kind of leader who learns visibly, serves intentionally, and invites others to climb toward higher ground alongside me.

And if that inspires even one person to be a little braver in their own development, then it’s worth it.

Where did that cover image come from?

Chat GPT made it…

This is the image I asked CHAT GPT to use to generate the cover image for this post:

It relates to this video…

QUOTE

How to NOT get Credit

I was honored to present at the first-ever (and I pray not the last) Lunch and Unlearn at:

Background

I was asked to contribute to an event with ATD CORE4. The Lunch and Unlearn is a simple and UN-SERIOUS take on the traditional Lunch and Learn, and I am honored that Bianca Woods thought of me. I did my best to not take it too seriously. This is my first dry run through to get a time for my part. I went a bit over on time in the prep recordings. I added some timers at the bottom of my PowerPoint slides, and I was right on time at the virtual LUNCH AND UNLEARN event!

“This event is ‘special’.”
~Bianca Woods

Second Dry Run

To prepare for the sessions, I made recordings of myself presenting. The nice thing about these is that they are over 4 minutes (my allotted time to speak). So, they add more context.

Seriously? Only 4 minutes?

I took this as a challenge to view my presentation in the same way. To not see it as a small thing, even though I only had 4 minutes to present. It reminded me of a learning event that a friend, Kassy LaBorie, shared with me. She had to present her entire brand and purpose on a big stage in front of a live audience. She only got 1 minute to speak. If she could do all that in a minute, surely I can do an “unlearn” session in 4 minutes. I even created a social post around my SPEAK!

Content

I wanted to start with a bit of my background, education, and work history. Then I shared a favorite TED talk for context.

Then I just had to do a mock-up of the old Learning Objective / 3-step process:

How to NOT get Credit

💥APPLY

💥BUY

💥DON’T PAY

First Dry Run

To show how Instructional Design and Facilitation is a fluid and iterative process. I want to share the original Dry Run Recording. This was from when I was still developing this program.

Event Security Blunder: DAVELEARN’s Overzealous Guard Incident

Overactive security led to negative participant experiences at the recent event DAVELEARN, a “smaller learning conference” which took place at the GAMELAYER.fm studios from November 10th to November 14th, 2025, in St. Louis, MO. Sources claim there was an overactive security guard on site, who reportedly refused entry to participants in the event that they could not present their badge.

CEO of the event, Dave, made a statement an hour ago from the mainstage at GAMELAYER STUDIOS:

“Team DAVELEARN apologizes for the actions of our overzealous security guard. We received some reports late last night, November 11th, 2025, that they were refused entry for having the wrong type of badge. We outsourced security for this event, and it appears that the proper vetting process for asset selection was not completed. Our sources indicate that this employee was dishonorably discharged from their local militia. We are releasing any more specifics at this point, but rest assured, this former employee was reprimanded and is no longer with us.”

Images of the imposter have been recovered from HD security camera footage.

Sources earlier this morning (11:07 AM November 20, 2025), including potential DAVELEARN Conference attendee Sheila B. Robinson, revealed on the professional Social Media app LinkedIn that “[She] couldn’t get past security at the convention center without wearing [her] badge and lanyard. ([She] was holding it in [her] hand one day, and they hassled [her]).”

SOURCE: https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:7396945595891998720?commentUrn=urn%3Ali%3Acomment%3A%28activity%3A7396945595891998720%2C7397153589778894848%29&dashCommentUrn=urn%3Ali%3Afsd_comment%3A%287397153589778894848%2Curn%3Ali%3Aactivity%3A7396945595891998720%29

A response to the post was delivered at the front doors of GAMELAYER STUDIOS by the DAVELEARN team’s Vice President of Human Resources, “Dave the HR guy,” to a sizable and eager press attendance. Due to a significant magnetic frequency disturbance in the area, there is no audio or video footage available for that official statement. However, text-based copies of the address were captured on pen and paper in real time.

“Thank you for attending this press update. Team DAVELEARN has received additional information regarding the previous employee on our security team, who is known only as ‘DAVE’, who we have confirmed entered into the position under a false identity. Our sources indicate he was only admitting attendies whose badge included the word ‘SECURITY’ on it at the South entrance. We would like to confirm that this was not the direction that was provided by team DAVELEARN, and in addition, we would like to apologize for any negative attendee experiences. This man was not of sound mind; he believed he was a reincarnation of Napoleon Bonaparte XIV, who recently passed away on the 10th of March, 2023. It is our promise that this will never happen again at any DAVELEARN event.”

Sources on site who witnessed the apprehension of the Security Guard formerly known as “Dave” state that he was found digging through the ashes of the stump that was lit on fire during the DAVELEARN event. The man who self-identified as a reincarnation of Napoleon Bonaparte XIV began to yell that he was on a crucial and pivotal mission, collecting scientific samples of the remains of the fire that needed to be analyzed by the proper authorities in what he called the “MO cave-dweller community.”

A person walking down the street where GAMELAYER STUDIOS is located observed, “Why do all these DAVES look like clones. What sort of conspiracy is this?”

GAMELAYER RADIO Launched

Hello! Thank you for reading, and I am sorry I have been a stranger. If you follow any of my social media feeds, you might have seen that I launched a Podcast last Friday. The launch was a success and included more than just a Podcast. I would like to share my experience starting a Podcast with a Newsletter and Marketing plan.

WELCOME TO PLAY

Do No Skip Analysis

Let’s be honest. There are a lot of podcasts out there, and the competition has just raised the bar. Instead of competing against my neighbor like I would have in 2004, I am competing with celebrity superstars from Conan O’Brien to Monica Lewinsky. This has been a slow progression, but the landscape has really changed over the last couple years.

This is why it is so important to really think out what you want your show to be about. It needs to be something you love, but it also needs to be niche and novel. The only way to pull listeners’ attention away from TV actors discussing what it was like to make their sitcom is to discuss something you really know or really like.

Which “Host” Platform?

Where you host your Podcast is not all that important to your listeners because you can link all the episodes as sound files via RSS to other platforms. That being said, each platform will offer you a unique experience around price, analytics, and storage.

My main criterion was unlimited storage for free. I don’t mind paying a bit to make the show, but I don’t want to pay forever to have it hosted because eventually I would probably end up stopping paying, not to mention I just do not want to spend that much money.

At the end, I had it narrowed down to Red Circle or Spotify. I love Red Circle as a host, and I really think I want to have another show on there soon, but Spotify recently acquired Anchor, and that brand has so much weight to it. At a certain point, I realized I was using my decision on which platform to choose to put off the launch of my show. So I just went with Spotify because it is HUGE, Free, and has unlimited storage. The last piece was that the analytics from Spotify are certified, so it would be easier to accept sponsors if that ever happens… You never know!

How Do I Record?

I started out using Adobe Podcast, and I really like that platform for recording podcasts. The interface is beautiful and intuitive. Unfortunately, the app crashed a lot, and I even lost some of my recordings. Also, the AI voice enhancer sometimes made me sound like I was someone else, and some of my editors even thought I had a third person on my show. I was shocked that Adobe did not perform, and that really is a first for me. I have grown to respect the Adobe brand, and I love it. Photoshop, Premiere, and Adobe Audition are all environment staples. I even use Adobe Audition to craft the more complex audio for the GAMELAYER show itself. I feel like Adobe Podcast has potential but it has yet to realize it.

I ended up going with Riverside.fm, and I absolutely love it. I am on the lowest paid tier, and the only thing I wish I had was downloadable transcripts (something I definitely want to have), but I think I have some other ideas on how to get those.

Marketing

This is a topic that I wanted to streamline on the cheap. I ended up using a free Buffer account, which lets me connect to up to 3 Social Channels. That’s not a lot, but I am thinking about where I want to be anyway. So far, I am at a branded channel at Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn. However, I am not that jazzed about being on Facebook, and I might just post links on the top of that page and abandon it for Blue Sky. If you are interested, I would recommend following the Instagram because I am mostly going to produce REELS from the show. (In addition to the Podcast of course, which I share in the next section.)

INSTAGRAM! https://www.instagram.com/gamelayer.fm/
LINKED IN! https://linkedin.com/company/gamelayerfm
YOUTUBE https://www.youtube.com/@GAMELAYERfm
FACEBOOK https://www.facebook.com/gamelayer.fm/

(The most recent reels appear at the bottom of this post.)

Another thing I have done that I need to build out more is look into SubStack. I was going to park all of my transcripts there, but I have found it can do so much more, like generate a newsletter, build a community, and even have paywalls for monetized content. I have hosted that at www.gamelayer.fm

Links to the Show

Last but not least, I would like to share the apps that I have chosen to include in the show so far. Please reach out to me on LinkedIn if you want to see this on another app or if you want to be on GAMELAYER!. In this section, I will paste unique versions of how I can share my Podcast using this WordPress web page.

Pocket Cast

Pocket Cast is quickly becoming my favorite Podcast APP, second only to Apple Podcasts.

Apple Podcast

You can never overlook the app that started it all, Apple Podcasts!
(I have not found a way to embed the player on WordPress, but I did get a QR code.)

Apple Podcasts link: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/gamelayer/id1804386590
QR link to Apple Player:

Spotify Podcast (Formerly Anchor

Next up, we have Spotify, which now owns Anchor and seems to be the largest host for the moment. All the stars are posting their shows there, which really lends itself to longevity. Some features are missing for the small fish like me, but to be honest, I just don’t care.

This last one is just fun. It is an RSS feed developed right in WordPress, so that’s neat! It is not a stand-alone Podcast player, so it only works here on this web page, but I like it because it showcases how easy it is to just paste your RSS feed somewhere and create a Podcast player! So fun!

208 – Becoming Yourself Outdoors with Sarah Garner – GAMELAYER

Unlocking Nature, Wellness, and Solopreneurship: An Interview with Sarah GarnerIn this episode, Sarah Garner shares how she built a life and business rooted in nature, wellness, and authenticity—showing it’s never too late to begin. She reflects on starting her entrepreneurial journey later in life, embracing imperfection, and letting her nomadic lifestyle shape a brand that feels true to her.She explains how aligning your work with your passions creates sustainable momentum and offers practical ways to move through fear. From sensory activities with essential oils to playful creativity, she shows how simple experiences deepen connection and learning—even with ourselves.Sarah also challenges stereotypes about who “belongs” outdoors, emphasizing inclusive experiences that empower people of all backgrounds. Her flexible approach to business is designed to evolve with her life and prevent burnout.Connect with Sarah Garner:Evergreen Explorations https://evergreenexplorations.myflodesk.com/welcome"Explore & Restore" Women's Adventure Wellness Retreat in Seward, AK 8/31-9/4 2026: https://evergreenexplorations.myflodesk.com/explorerestore26LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/sarahlynngarner/ https://www.linkedin.com/company/evergreenexplorations/INSTA h⁠ttps://www.instagram.com/evergreenexploration/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/evergreenexplorations/Key topics:The importance of starting despite perfectionism and resource constraintsThe role of authenticity and alignment in building a sustainable businessPractical outdoor experiences that foster connection and learning — with others, and ourselvesNavigating fears and boundaries as a solo entrepreneurThe significance of iteration, realignment, and avoiding burnoutUsing sensory experiences like scents and art to connect with nature virtually and in-personShifting perceptions about who belongs outside or in entrepreneurship spacesTimestamps:00:00 – The value of starting without waiting for perfect conditions00:20 – Sarah's journey into outdoor wellness and experiential learning01:20 – Overcoming perfectionism and resource limitations02:56 – The power of authenticity and passion03:35 – Embracing a nomadic lifestyle and its impact on business04:43 – How outdoor activities foster connection and engagement05:56 – Addressing stereotypes around who belongs outdoors07:00 – The role of sensory experiences in virtual and outdoor learning08:37 – Differences between consulting and direct-to-consumer 09:53 – The importance of experiential learning methods10:58 – Simplify through play12:28 – The importance of outdoor wellness for mental health14:32 – Science-backed techniques for connecting with nature15:07 – Breaking down misconceptions in the wellness industry16:23 – The counterintuitive nature of office environments18:43 – The significance of boundaries and setting limits as a solo entrepreneur20:33 – The fallacy of visual, tactile, and auditory learning styles23:00 – The ongoing process of iteration, and authentic branding27:14 – Why solopreneurship is fundamentally self-serving and necessary30:23 – The risks of comparison and the importance of authenticity43:36 – Overcoming fears of venturing outside or starting a new project44:35 – The upcoming Alaska retreat: "Explore and Restore"45:47 – The importance of alignment and continuous realignment50:39 – Risks of burnout in solopreneurship and the importance of boundaries51:27 – The value of container boundaries inspired by band practice and personal limits54:07 – Practical advice for starting today and embracing flexibilityAlternate Reality Titles:Start Where You Are: Reinventing Life Through NatureBecoming Yourself Outdoors: The Sarah Garner StoryIt’s Never Too Late: Building a Life and Business Rooted in NatureAuthenticity as a Strategy: How Nature Helped Sarah Garner Start AgainNomadic Entrepreneurship: How Movement Shaped a MissionDesigning a Business That Evolves With You

Recent Instagram Reels

I would like to close out by saying thanks for reading and post a widget that claims it will continuously update with the most recent Instagram Reels. So if you trust Good Ole’ Improvement Dave more than Social Media (Which I think you should.) you can bookmark this page and come back to it weekly to see what I’m up to. Or, of course, you could go to GAMELAYER.FM, but I am not thinking the Reels will live there at this point.