In my last two posts, Consistency and What Does Consistency Mean to You? I delved into who I am and what I am doing to improve myself. It was rather lavishly selfish and self-serving. I apologize for that. I will take ownership of both of those posts and admit they were not serving my readers in ways I am super proud of. At the same time, I will not delete them. That’s where I was at that time, I needed that, and I also need to own them. I was working on personal improvements that maybe don’t belong on a professional Learning and Development blog, or maybe they do. I guess that’s the good thing about blogs, it kind of doesn’t matter.
I was thinking about this last week as I sat watching my son dig through his swim lesson at the local YMCA. I saw him working on lifting his head gracefully to take a breath in a way that was anything but graceful. He was lifting his mouth far above the water and taking giant gulps of air through his mouth open wide. It was cartoonish. Anyone else watching would have seen a child who doesn’t know how to take a breath during freestyle.
However, that was my child, and I talk to him frequently. When we ride in the van to school, as I tuck him in at night, when we sit in the backyard breaking sticks. I know he is working hard on taking a good breath during the freestyle. I know how long it has been since he could not take a breath to the side instead of raising his head in the front. I know this is a challenge for him. I know this is a big goal of his. I know about the personal work he has done alone and with me at the pool to improve his swimming strokes. I know his work on diving to the bottom, practicing holding his breath, and getting his goggles just right. I see the personal work that he has had to do to be able to swim as well as he can now. We have discussed the excitement and fear he has related to deep diving.
When I shared my last two posts I was sharing my personal work. The things I was doing for me to make my overall performance more effective. Nobody really cared, I didn’t get comments on Linked In, and sadly enough I noticed that, and it meant something to me. Then I stopped posting. The truth is maybe somebody did read that and got something out of it. I was making it about me, about people responding to me. It shouldn’t matter if nobody responds. Ideally, I shouldn’t care how many people read.
Better Writing
During the summer months, I mow my own lawn. I normally listen to Music and Podcasts but I have pockets when I choose Audiobooks. Back in February of 2021, I listened to a condensed version of This book will teach you how to write better by Neville Medhora and it answered questions I didn’t know I had.
I can summarize this in two sentences:
People care about themselves, people do not care about you.
People respond to what his new novel or helpful.
As an Instructional Designer, or in this case a writer of learning content, these statements hit home for me. I stopped the lawnmower, pulled out my phone, and typed these nuggets into my notes app. After some consideration and revising this post before publishing, I realized that I am pulling from that moment subconsciously, so I should share why I feel the way I do here. These statements aren’t groundbreaking, and in a way they are a bit obvious, but having them as a guide as a learning content writer who does not consider himself a naturally gifted writer, was very helpful.
Internal Wins
Stephen Covey first published the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People in August of 1989, and I first read it nearly 29 years later in 2018. I am basing this observation off of the 7 Habits. The first half of the list is internal wins or “Private Habits”:
Sharpen the Saw, find a balance between work and relaxation
Be Proactive, take charge, and assume responsibility for your life
Begin with the end in mind, Have a vision for the future to make your ideas reality
These three internal wins get you ready for the transition to external wins #4 to Put things first and focus on what’s important. After that is when the internal wins start to support your external wins, wins that others can observe. Once you have implemented the first 4 into your life then you are ready to move on to:
Think Win-Win, find a solution that is profitable for everyone.
Seek first to understand, then to be understood, first really listen, then make recommendations.
Synergize, together you are stronger than alone.
So, sharing my internal wins, or new “Private Habits”, candidly was meant to show what I was working on and how I was improving myself. However, those wins are for me, those are mine, and I can’t really expect other people to be excited about them like I am. After all, People don’t care about me. Do I still bring up my Spindrift carbonated water with lemon juice and my intermittent fasting to strangers at my daughter’s dance practice? Well, yeah, I still do, and I maybe need to work on that if that is over-sharing; but for here, on this channel, this blog, I am going to pause and pivot. I am not going to consistently tell you about how consistent I am in my diet, work, or sleep patterns and expect you to be happy for me.
The truth is, nobody liked the post much on LinkedIn or Facebook, but I just checked the stats on WordPress, because I was curious, and that post had more views than any of my other recent posts in some time, and I even got some likes on Worpress itself, which I’m not sure I have ever had. So, I am back to square one with Dr. Socrates. I now know that I definitely don’t know sh^t. I need to stop overthinking this, (and maybe rebuild parts of my 4th wall.) Overthinking is not a new pitfall for me. Unfortunately, Analysis Paralysis is kind of my jam and I need to shed that like last year’s skin. Maybe that is what this BLOG is about.
I am going to post consistently, for you (and for me). I’m not going to overthink what I post, I’m just going to keep posting consistently. oh, yeah, and I’m going to keep breathing, probably not drinking alcohol, eating right, and working out HARD 3 times a week, (but I’ll try to keep that more to myself moving forward.)
Work Cited
Covey, Stephen R. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Restoring the Character Ethic. [Rev. ed.]. Free Press, 2004.
Medhora, Neville. This book will teach you how to write better. [1st ed.]. Neville Medohora, 2013.
About the Author
David Kolmer is a learning professional who currently works and lives in St. Louis, MO. He does not have a degree in nutrition but does hold a Bachelor of Arts in Theater Arts and a Master of Arts in Instructional Design and Educational Technology.
Improvement Dave 